Way back when, wedding invitations didn’t need an accompanying response card for the guests to RSVP. Instead, the guest would take it upon themselves to write a congratulatory note on their own stationery and include whether they would be in attendance at the nuptials. It’s old school, but, man, what a great idea – personalized and so special for you and your fiance.
That was then, and this is now; welcome to the RSVP etiquette of 2013…
To start, there are many ways to have your guests RSVP: on your website, through your wedding app, e-mail, phone call or text, postcard or traditional response card. Which one is right for you? Well, that’s your decision, but there are some considerations. Think of the guests you’re inviting — do they all have a smartphone, are they web savvy? If yes, then having them reply online or via an app is totally fine. If you’re worried that some people won’t be able to get the wedding app or reply online, then a phone and mail option is probably best. Also, if you’re wedding is more traditional, then a response card or RSVP postcard fits that better than a technology based response. If you’re not sure which option is best, they’re is no harm in using multiple response methods — for example, let guests reply via your website and postcard.
Another consideration is, do you want a keepsake? With a more traditional RSVP postcard or response card, you’ll have the memory and notes that your guests sent for your memory book. It’s likely if you reply online, that the website will become inactive after a period of time and your information will be lost. So, you might want to think about what you want in terms of looking back on your 20th wedding anniversary.
How organized are you? As a bride, there is lot going on… you have your day-to-day life and responsibilities AND everything regarding your wedding. It can be a lot and very stressful. Think about what will be easiest for you to keep track of; phone calls and text messages can easily get lost or forgotten. Same for email (just think of all the email you get in a day). A wedding website or phone app makes it pretty simple to track and with a mailed response, you have the physical card for cataloging.
Plan ahead… no matter which method you choose, your response by date should be 3-4 weeks before your wedding. Your final count deadline with your vendors will be right around this time as well, so it’s important to coordinate with them and allow a little extra time. Planning ahead with a 3-4 week respond by date also gives you some time to call your guests that you have yet to hear from.
Personally, I like the RSVP postcard or response card. Getting them back in the mail every day is like a little present in the mailbox. It’s always a surprise and you never know how many you’ll receive each day — it gives you a good reason to check your mail!